SWILnews Vol. 7 No. 13-ish Februarlj>16 Just when Ijou thought it was safe to go back in your mailbox, here it is--SWILNEWS!!! {gasps of astonishl~ent, SCi'eam~ of terror, giggles of titilation} The SAGA people misspelled "SWIL" as "religion" this week. The McCabe Scholars (who apparently read as ~ell as ~e do) entered and demanded that we yield our territ.ory. We met their challenge full force and rose in battle. Chairs, trays, and small children filled the air as students and food scurr1~d for cover. It soon became apparent that the McCabe Scholars had no chance against the 'Superior intellect, taste in clothes, and weaponry of St"'IL, and ~ould be driven into the distant wastelands of Sharples, sure to perish. Therefore, out of the kindness o~ our spleens, we yielded to their sup~rior inferiority and left ~uietly, that they might live. Sorrlj ~ou missed it, J & Sh.? The speaking member of the DIumverate (The Hindmost li\'ed up to his name so well, he didn't arrive at all), being a Bear o~ \'ertj Little Brain, passed around a sign-up sheet (& her pencil, George II) for attendance. Conse~uently, our nomadic tribe of SWILfolk consisted o~: Mike Kane, Chuck Blackwell (two rather ~uiet alums), the Dullj Elected Self-Proclaimed Gang of Four (Titles too Boring to MentionJ (Dave Szeut-Gljorgtji), Detache from the Propaganda Minister (Anne Mvlott) (t'.&lO relativellj un-~uiet alums), Debby, Timothlj, Miria, Jay (who has been himself ~uite a lot lately), Ruth, Zaphod Beeblebrox, th~ ASSASSIN, Esther, Carin (who was celebrating her 1/2 Birthdal,l, including a 1/2 B-Day cake), He who goof up when it counts (aka the Court Beggar), He who is! (But who he who is is is uncertain)(actualllj, it was Gavi,n, but let"s 5ee anljbodlj else get 3 is"s in a row!), King for a Day, Minister of Foreign Affairs and French Women, the French Woman, the Drexel Liason, and me, since I missed mtj chance to be creati,-'e and Just never signed the sheet. I don"t know who wer~ non-members and who weren"ti ~urthermore, I don"t care. The first order of business was the movefflent made by Perry to rename the werljleaders. Suggestions were taken, and ~e finally voted on Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. We waited and waite:d for a veto, but no one said a word. So the motion has carried, nice' and le:gal-like. Jalj reports that BEM has reached the big 5 on submis5i-ons--enough to print, but not enough to reject. :-ie"s realllj dying to reject some stuff, folk5, so wade through your slush piles and send in those rejectable5! Ch, good stories, etc., are also ~el(:oQe. Some nice person whose identity shall remain forgotten mentioned that the Feb issue of F & SF has a Jan Valone stOT'Y in it, in case anyone's in.terested. Gavin, once cornered, hinted that he might do 50mething in the way of a still life for the T-shirt. (Of cour5e, if he uses food from SAGA, it mall not be too still). Look on the br.ight side., folks--he had l.--";:~;;;;,~'" ..~' ~:I'.".:,;,\y~"",," .." ,. -- been planning to do something obscene with a plastic bag, a SAGA entree, and a ~ero~ machine. The Pilgrimage has been postponed for the third hit week in a row. But this time we mean it--we will be going into Philly this Saturday night. Since finances (or lack thereof) seems to be a major concern, plans are being made for mugging people on the train into the cittJ. Actually, this one should be fairly cheap--S.;Je will either go out to dinner or see a movie (Fantasia, most likely), but not both. We shant be bored though, for we shall have stories, Jokes, songs, dancing, wild animal tricksl people-watching, c'omple~ meaningles-:. rituals, high-speed car chases, and Just generally. entertain ourselves as onll,l SWILfolk can. PLUS we shall begin Phase One of the most birarre scavenger hunt in recent -historl,l. Come and see what we mean--time will be announced at this week's SWILmeeting; or call DVS or myself. WeIll that's about all, though it's more than enough. Take care of l,Iourselfl and write soon. Love, Mom Oops! I meant: Mom, Love No, that should be: Love, Love (got it!) ~ ..