Date: Fri, 13 May 1994 20:46:58 -0400
Subject: So long, farewell, aufwiedersehen, good-SWILnews! (#14)

(drumroll... that particular drum rolls, in fact, all the way down the hall
of ML 2nd, makes a quick right turn and up a few steps, pounds on the door
of Catbutt quint and nuzzles the foot of TG, who is currently frantically
finishing his Modern Philosophy final.  It makes small whimpering noises
but he is forthright and purposeful.  Without dropping a participle, TG
boots the ingratiating percussion over his head and out the window where it
becomes lodged in the branch of a tree for the summer, or at least until
the next coming of the north wind) [uh... right. -TG]

     Okay, it was kind of a slow meeting and I got there late.  I walked in
tohear that Schlock unexpectedly went over budget, as Kit Parker films
brought up the costs with insurance and other shipping and handling fees. 
In any case, a collection was taken up to pay for the 55 or so dollars that
 it ran over. [of course, it ran over another  45 but TG paid for that out
of his pocket. -TG]   [it's a pretty large pocket.  and it's purple. -L] If
you can contribute, it would be cool, as otherwise TG is paying this out of
his own pocket. [different pocket, same bank account. -TG]   Another
slightly unfavorable  economic indicator is the fact that we need a
treasurer for next year as Larry our current Treasurer and vice-president
in charge of moist towlettes has found that the towlettles are his true
calling and that to follow the way to pine scented Nirvana, he must
renounce worldly goods.  Any volunteers?  The issue has been tabled until
we have a new batch of freshlings to prey upon. 

     Andrea hopes that people didn't have too much difficulty  finding
Walpurgisnacht, there was a problem with the space people and  she had to
wait several years for their identical twins to get back from Polaris and
open the door, the original ones having died off.  Aren't you glad you took
Physics 6?  

        Besh and Larry are going to be curating George and Cordwainer
respectively, next year.  Both, I believe went to book buying and stocked
up for next semester.  Speaking of George, Charles tells us that our
remarkably transient memorial library memorial library has been neatly
stacked and cleaned up by of all people- C, P&P  (that's Career Planning
and Placement to y'all) (or College Pharmaceuticals
 and Placemats)  Apparently they got sick of the mess.  Charles, by the way
is going to work for the space people which is all too appropriate 
-CHARLES...IN....SPAAAAACE!

      T-shirts are here now, Besh is going to see about getting them for
tomorrow's meeting, if not, we may have to mail them too.  (Oh rage, oh
desespoir!)  Yar. [actually, somebody's pocket is going to have to pay TG
since he won't be there and that means shipping and handling on a shirt. -a
very satisfied TG]

        Our final bit of real SWIL Business concerned a pair  of
dismemberments that have been in the works for some time.  Kathy Davis
initiated the petition for  Mark Kernighan and Sofia Sarafova to be
dismembered by Excecutive Rule #4  just to spite them for avoiding our
ranks.  Muahahahaha.  As neither of them was around to be dismembered,
effigies were made out of salt and pepper shakers and  the carnage took
place in spirit. (as it often tends to around finals).   All objections
from the two are to be answered by a collective "Nyaah!" 

Non-SWIL business included Jacob Mattisons extremely spiffy Senior Art
Exhibit and the fact that Josh Burdick is not only the Messiah, but the
Presence.  With that, we wish you all good summers and give you... 

ATTENDANCE  5-7-94

Michael "Maybe a bastard child but I'll never know" Brus, Elizabeth
"Sanding off my dead twin sister" Christian, Robert "Ramapithecus with more
ears on vacation" Richardson, Kathy "Don't listen to him; he's just a
woodchuck on steroids" Davis, Charles "Ballistic in all things" Danforth,
Badwithanr "I have just juggled decanned spam -life is now complete" Gabe,
Andrea "I think my medication is kicking in" Hall, Colin "I think my candy
is jumping out" Schatz, Ahyana "_Blue!_" -"I am privileged enough to sit
next to 'Larry the Treasurer ' Miller" Clark, Larry "I no longer have a
placenta" Miller, Jacob "still have both ears" Mattison, Julianna "Not warm
& fuzzy" Patrick, Kristin "I just have a paper left" [growl -L] Walker,
Josh "cluster master" Burdick, Samuel "Charles has my polyphasic umbrella"
Weiler, jere7my "I didn't kill my wife!" tho?rpe [sorry friend, you can run
but you can't hide -L] Mitochondria DO NOT water the plants!!!! Mark "You
can't dismember me, I'm not here" Kernighan, Sofia "By the skin of her
teeth" Sarafova

                                        -Literature & The Grotesque